Is Jenny McCarthy a Danger to the World?

It should bother me that this is a joke that is, you know.. right.

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Is Jenny McCarthy a Danger to the World?

Droopy Pants: Do You Feel Lucky, Punk?

Well do ya?

Canton City Councilwoman Mary Cirelli knows evil, true evil. She’s an Ohio Congress Woman with a mission, to stop people from sagging their pants.

Oh yes, she’s fighting the (totally 90’s) trend of dropping pants so your rear is showing.

See, Councilwoman Mary Cirelli is offended by the trend and she’s not going to take it anymore, so naturally she sees it fit to go all sorts of Dirty Harry on the punks. While on one hand, the trend now is actually more fitting clothing, so she is indeed the fashion police.

She’s attempting to use indecency laws to make the droopy folk get some belts or (assumingly) face a fine.

Cause. there’s evil afoot and Mary’s fighting it.

/sarcasm

(Kickass Nightrider Mobile = Awesome and completely unrelated, but you can read about that here. Image from FoxNews)

Droopy Pants: Do You Feel Lucky, Punk?

After Careful Consideration

I've decided to be nice. Hence why the previous post was removed- no sense in kicking people while they are down right?

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After Careful Consideration

This is War Man, War

The other day whilst minding my own affairs, I came upon the lair (read: the bedroom) of the enemy. A godless horde of crawly bitey little insects (read:fleas).

I just snapped, and it’s really quite amazing how many options open up when you are having a bit of a nervous breakdown. I swore that I had indeed run out of places to appealingly place my possessions, and as such they were to remain in their present locations (read: the floor).

That was, until I had logically deducted the horde had indeed attacked. Sneaking in amongst my loving family dog, and perchance sneaking the rest of the way using my cat (who is incedentally not so loving).

Devious bastards they are.

To step back slightly, my home isn’t a mess by far. It’s a jumbled mishmash of art supplies, computer parts, tools for fixing the latter, and a few other things that are hard to place together in any logical or tangible sense.

Thrown into this already confusing cross section of crap is countless clothing care of both myself and my daughter (well, her clothing is rather neatly in organizers), toys (mine and kid’s), game systems (mine and kid’s), a fridge (yes, I do have a fridge in my room).

Now, at some point due to some complicated physics my room has shrunk. I am not entirely sure when this actually occurred, but it did at some point. Granted, precise measurements and the rest of the results of the scientific study do still need to come back, but I await those knowingly (they will confirm my suspicions, oh yes they will).

Moving along now, navigating carefully walking through my things, I happened to look down and to my horror there were the hellbeasts on my feet, 30 or so of the spawn of some succubus (read: my ex was somehow involved, those tests will be back next week, I expect them to confirm my ex indeed sent these legions).

I spent the rest of the day having what is called I believe, a ‘shit fit’ (scientific term) and cleaning every little nook that would be even remotely feasible. I believe the count for the amount of times I scrubbed the floor alone was roughly one for each of the hellbeasts (30 or so).

Yet, nothing more. Apparently, the little bastards were alone. I haven’t so much as seen a single other one. Now, I’m confused and waiting patiently for the attack.*

*Okay not so much, I had just come in from outside. My yard is overflowing with the things, happens every damned year. Sadly, that same logic wasn’t applied that day. (See: Shit Fit)

This is War Man, War

GoGo SqueeZ: A Better Snack

Normally (and admittedly), I wouldn’t be writing about a snack for kids. I can't stand the sugery crap that is normally considered 'snack food' for kids.

This one is actually worth writing about however. It's actually healthy, and has real fruit. Two definate bonus' in my book and my daughter's (offer that kid a cookie or some other suger filled junk she will act like you hit her).

I’ll let the company speak for itself:

Originally designed for NASA astronauts, each all-natural pouch contains a full serving of fruit – just simple, clean ingredients. GoGo squeeZ is the perfect snack for kids of any age.

“Children are interested in flavor and a fun design – but we know parents are looking for a snack of more substance they can be sure their kids will eat when on-the-go,” said David Istier, Materne’s North American VP of Marketing. “GoGo squeeZ comes in a fun package, is simple for kids to use independently, and actually tastes good. Parents can enjoy the benefits of providing their children with a no-mess, no-fight, healthy snack option.”

Currently available in “appleapple” and “applestrawberry” flavors, GoGo squeeZ is

re-launching in June with a 100 percent fruit, no added sugar range including new packaging graphics that will focus on key product benefits and flavor differentiation. Three new flavors are being launched this month that are sure to keep kids squeezing. New “applecinnamon,” “applepeach” and “applebanana” flavors combine the health benefits of all-natural fruit with a great taste. All GoGo squeeZ products contain no artificial flavors or preservatives and are gluten-free, dairy-free and kosher-certified.

4-packs are $2.99 Single pouches are available for 99 cents.

While it’s primarily available in New England, it’s also readily available online.

You can find it at Whole Foods, Stop&Shop, Shaws and Jewel-Osco in select Toys ‘R Us/ Babies’ R US, and other retailers across the US.

I also seriously dig the packaging and the fact it’s resealable. The flavor selection rocks, and the

fact that it’s actually healthy is fantastic.

*Thanks to my submitter, who alerted me to this.

If you have a fab goodie, write me at admin@notquitecookiecutter.com

GoGo SqueeZ: A Better Snack